and there was nothing.
nothing left in the end.

zishing
04-12-1992
no preferences
nothing particular.
the place people come to for help.
and that's about it.

AB
AiPing
Amos
Andy
Baka-Tsuki
Caroline
ChinHian
Dom
De-Coder's Cafe a.k.a.Yap
Hisyam
JingSheng
LeeYang
Kee
Leonard
LiJie
MarcusChan
Matilda
Max
MelWeh
RongRong
RuiFen
Sarah
SiHui
Stewart
Sumo
Valerie
Zak

August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 May 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 February 2011 April 2011 September 2011 November 2011

designer: frozen.d}
resources: x

just
alright. 1 word.
hiatus.

before i go, i saw this piece of paper i used for pc when kevin was still around.

and i shall re-reflect on what is on it.

I am learning how to live my life properly.

I cannot understand why I'm actually living when I don't deserve to. Do I?

I am unhappy when I think about [what I did to] a certain someone.

My classmates think I'm an "emolio".

I like myself best when I finally succeed in life, if I ever find out what it actually means.

Tomorrow I would like to smile and keep to what I promised to do (which is study).

My best friend is my worst enemy.

Something I would like to tell any teacher is "I'm sorry I haven't been paying attention. Don't worry I will try my best and hopefully not fail. I know you'll worry anyway. Thank you."
I used to be worried about what my future with that certain someone would be. Well the future is now [and it isin't really great, but still...].

I have achieved living for 14 years, 279 days, 6 hours, 29 minutes and roughly 56 seconds and counting, life moving according to plan with minimal obstacles, and really nothing else. I'm not useless I just fail at everything.

I taught someone [not] to trust me anymore. Actually could that be more than one person?
I'm not afraid to continue failing, knowing that I won't attempt suicide, I've already succeeded over that.

I have always wanted to say my final words to that certain someone (which I am going to soon enough).

The best thing that has happened to me was knowing what large houses, tai tee, lanterns and pomelos whoever who was linked to really were. And also learning a hell lot with that certain someone. I'll have my fair share to say to you soon enough.

and my conclusion.
i give thanks. one to whoever might rule up there.
one to meeting people. and the memories they give.
and one to all the times we shared, good or bad.
even though parting might be like the cold winter, even though it is only autumn now.
maybe i might meet someone warm like the spring.
maybe.

alright. and if anyone would happen to chance over this post. thank you for wasting your time.
now back to studying, and planning for my miracle to come.
(=